Updates (Rush Limbaugh)

Updates are comedy routines done by Rush Limbaugh on his radio program. Each mocks a different person or group with whom he disagrees. While still part of the program, they are featured much less frequently than in the early to mid-1990s.

Homeless Update: The earliest of updates has Clarence "Frogman" Henry sing "Ain't Got No Home" about a lonely homeless frog.

Animal Rights Update: Features the "Born Free" song mixed with gunfire and animal sounds.

Feminazi Update: Prefaced by The Forrester Sisters (who attended Wesleyan College in Macon, Georgia) singing, "Men" amid a progressively distorted voice saying, "We're fierce, we're feminists, and we're in your face", with accompanying laughter.

Gorbasm (Gorbachev Update): Another early update, using the "Imperial March / Darth Vader Theme" by John Williams from Star Wars. Updates were not only about Gorbachev, but also about the reaction of the American Left to Gorbachev - i.e., the "Gorbasm", that joyful feeling that Gorbachev's actions gave them.

Jerry Brown Update: Used heavily in 1992. Featured the Linda Ronstadt song "You're No Good". Ronstadt was once Jerry Brown's girlfriend.

Kennedy Update: Two different updates.
* The first features an old Paul Shanklin song prefacing the update. Song is a parody of "The Wanderer" called "The Philanderer", done in Senator Edward Kennedy's voice. At one time (1998) a soap opera organ style instrumental prefaced this update directed at the Kennedy Clan.
*Early in 2005, Limbaugh introduced a new Kennedy Update, featuring another Paul Shanklin song called "Osama Obama" set to the tune of the Mexican folk song "La Bamba" (the latter famously recorded by Ritchie Valens and Los Lobos). This was inspired by a news interview in which Kennedy inadvertently called Barack Obama "Osama Obama".

McCain Update: Moderate Republican Senator John McCain's update is prefaced by song by Paul Shanklin in John McCain's voice (2001) called "Double Talk on the Wild Side"

Barney Frank Update: Barney Frank was alleged to have been in a pedophilia-related scandal; thus "My Boy Lollipop" prefaces this.

Ross Perot Update: During Perot's political heyday in the 1990s, this update featured Shanklin impersonating Perot in a parody of the Napoleon XIV novelty song "They're Coming to Take Me Away Ha-Haaa!"

Timber Update: The Jackyl song "The Lumberjack", which features a chain saw solo, prefaces this.

Gay Update: Has an Eighties version of "You Don't Own Me" done by Klaus Nomi, one of the first celebrities to die of AIDS.

AIDS Update: Rush featured Dionne Warwick's rendition of "I Know I'll Never Love This Way Again" as his AIDS Update theme song.

Liberal Update: Rarely done, it has the song "Gimme Dat Ding" to characterize the Robin Hood attitude liberals are said to have.

Hillary Update: Of Hillary Rodham Clinton, Senator of New York, it has "Born a Woman" by Sandy Posey from the Sixties.

SUV Update: Paul Shanklin song "In a Yugo" (a sendup of the Elvis Presley classic "In the Ghetto") is used as a prelude to any news update involving sport utility vehicles.

War Protest Update: Rush featured Slim Whitman's rendition of "Una Paloma Blanca" accompanied with explosions as his war protest update theme.

John Kerry Update: "Bad Vibrations" -- a take-off of the Beach Boys "Good Vibrations." One of Rush's newest updates. In response to Kerry's usage of the phrase "Help is on the way" during his nomination speech at the 2004 Democratic National Convention, Rush has started using the Mighty Mouse theme song, "Here I come to save the day!"

All updates started with Rush saying, "Daddalup Daddalup Daddalup" (borrowed from "Superjock" Larry Lujack, who preceded his "Klunk Letter of the Day" with the same verbal fanfare) which he states is a fanfare horn section. The song for the update came next with news particular to the associated genre.

Rush's "Caller Abortion" was not, strictly speaking, an update, as it had no fanfare, only the screams of the caller being aborted.

"Safe Talk", also not strictly an update, is another method with which Rush "illustrates absurdity by being absurd." He applies a condom to the microphone, claiming that once the condom is in place, the listeners are safe from hearing anything that could possibly offend them. He did this to illustrate the point that condoms do not provide absolute guaranteed protection from anything, however, abstinence does.